My mom really likes to stock up on cold weather wear like mittens, jackets, tuques and scarves. I guess this would've worked with three young children in the house, but now that we're all grown we tend just to buy our own stuff. Still, my mom has yet to curb her habit of jumping on winter sales whenever she sees 'em.
Every now and again, my siblings and I secretly comb through the stash of unworn winter wear and donate selected items behind our mother's back. Up until recently, my mom was completely in the dark about our back door charity op.
One day I was bugging my mom about a box of shoes in the garage which she refused to get rid of.
Me: Mom, you clearly don't wear any of these shoes, so you either need to donate them, or stop buying new shoes.
Mom: I will wear them one day!
Me: No you won't! They've been in the garage for 5 years! I bet you don't even know what's in there, and you wouldn't even notice if I got rid of them and never told you!
Mom: Yes I would notice! I know what is in my house and I know what belongs to me!
Me: Well you certainly didn't notice the big donation of gloves and tuques we made!
Mom: WHAT?!?!? WHAT DID YOU GIVE AWAY?!?!?!?
Me: See, you don't even know what went missing! Proof that it's better off being used by someone else!
Mom: WHERE DID YOU GIVE ALL OUR STUFF?!?!?
I didn't want to tell my mom we had made the donation to Goodwill because one time she literally made us go back to Goodwill to retrieve a previously donated item.... I know right?!
I thought that lying to her would be the best way to keep her from wanting to get her stuff back.
Me: I donated them to a church.
Mom: *fuming* ....... WHICH. CHURCH.
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